Being Appreciative

In my previous talks this week, I have defined a patriot as one who fulfills his allotted role in the nation in which God has placed him. And I have dealt with four aspects of attitude or character, which we need to cultivate if we are to do this; that is, to fulfill our allotted role. And these aspects of attitude or character were as follows:

1. First, seeing ourselves as part of a whole, not just as detached individuals, but responsible to our fellow human beings.
2. Second, being what I call relatable—I coined that word—the kind of person to whom other people can relate. In particular, the kind of person who can see his obligations in a covenant relationship. And I pointed out that the United States is in this sense unique among modern nations, in that it is founded upon a covenant, which we call the Constitution. And the well-being and the success of the United States depends on men and women in this nation being able to fulfill the requirements of a covenant in their dealings and relationship with one another.
3. The third aspect of attitude or character that I mentioned was seeing ourselves as contributors—not approaching every situation with the attitude “What can I get out of this?” but “What can I contribute?” And particularly cultivating excellence in our particular job or profession.
4. And fourth, communicating a positive attitude, being encouragers, not discouragers.

In my talk today I am going to share about one more aspect of our behavior which is closely related to those I have just listed. That is being appreciative. Being appreciative, showing appreciation, is what I call the oil that makes the machinery of society run smoothly, both on a small and a large scale. Whether it’s in a family, or whether it’s business, or whether it’s in a larger community, or whether it’s in a nation, one thing that is necessary for each of us to fulfill our function as Christians and as patriots, in that true sense of the word, is to cultivate being appreciative, being thankful, expressing gratitude.

I have had a very wide exposure over the course of my life to different nations and cultures and I have always sought to learn. For instance, I spent eight years of my life in different parts of Africa—five years in East Africa. There I was responsible for a teacher training college, training African teachers for their jobs as teachers of the local schools. And I had to deal with probably at least ten different tribes, all part of the one nation of Kenya. And I discovered to my surprise, as I learned a little of their tribal languages, that there were some tribes that had no word for “Thank you” in their language. And that caused me to meditate on what it means just to have a word to say “Thank you.” And I began to see, in actual fact, that really this is one contribution of the Bible to our society. The Bible is really the source of appreciating other people and where the Bible’s influence has not been felt, or where it has been rejected, you will find that there is very little thankfulness left in society.

Another aspect of my own personal experience is that my first wife was Danish and I have a special love for the people of Denmark. And I speak Danish and I’ve spent a good deal of time not only in Denmark but in Scandinavia, Sweden as well. There are certain aspects of their culture which to me are very precious. For instance, in Denmark at the end of every meal, every person who has sat around the table will turn to the mother or the hostess and say “Tak for mad.” That means, “Thank you for food.” Very simple, it can be just a formality, but I want to assure you that it makes a difference to the whole atmosphere that you don’t leave the table without expressing your gratitude to the one who provided the food for you. It’s just part of the oil that makes society run smoothly.

Then again, in any country in Scandinavia, whether it is Denmark or Sweden or Norway, when you have been hosted by somebody, the next time you contact that person, whether it is by phone or whether you meet them, or whatever it may be, the first thing you say is “Tak for sidst,” “Thank you for last time.” See again, simple, but it is like oil—it keeps relationships running smoothly. I have got so used to that, that I kind of miss it when I am in a culture which doesn’t have this provision. Now I am not saying everybody has got to copy that culture but I am just pointing out to you two simple ways in which being appreciative really affects the life of a nation.

There are real serious moral and ethical problems in the Scandinavian nations today, alas. But anybody that has been in Denmark or Sweden, setting aside those problems which are recent, I think they would acknowledge that they’re very pleasant countries to visit, very pleasant countries to live in. And one simple cause is this cultivating the habit of saying, “Thank you for food,” at the end of the meal; “Thank you for the last time we were together,” “Thank you for your hospitality.” I tell you, every time you say, “Thank you,” it is like dropping a little drop of oil on the machinery of life. It keeps the machinery running smoothly. It is also a key to bringing out the best in other people, is being appreciative.

I want to relate a little incident. My second wife, Ruth, and I were on a journey, and I was going to a number of preaching assignments. I had a very heavy schedule in front of me, and so by the kindness of some Christian friends, it was arranged for us to travel first-class on a leg of the journey in the airplane. So, we were there in the first-class compartment, and there weren’t many people, so there was one airline steward, a man, who more or less devoted his time to looking after us. He was very kind, very attentive, and so on. And we just responded in a way that was perfectly natural by being grateful and saying, “Thank you,” and smiling. We got off the plane at our destination and we were on the walkway into the airport, and this steward actually ran after us, stopped us, and he said, “I just have to tell you something.” He said, “We have a lot of passengers who pay first-class fares, but we don’t have many first-class passengers.” And I was really overwhelmed. I thought: “What did we do?” And then I thought, “We just showed a little appreciation and it brought out this spontaneous expression of appreciation from the airline steward.” So you see, that’s like going around with an oil can, and dropping oil on every situation, making it run more smoothly.

Just to conclude what I am saying about being appreciative, I want to point out to you, out of the New Testament, that it is not just something that is advisable, it is a Christian duty, it is something that is enjoined upon us as Christians. I want to read two passages from the writings of Paul. First, Ephesians 5:18–20:  

“Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit [capital “s,” the Holy Spirit]. Speak to one another with psalms, hymns and spiritual songs. Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.”  

One of the marks of being filled with the Holy Spirit is you will be a thankful person. You see, the Holy Spirit is typified as oil. And when you have got plenty of oil in the Holy Spirit, your life will be like a little oil can. Wherever you go a little drop of oil will come out. “Thank you.” “Thank You, God.” “Thank you” to your fellow men. “Thank you for serving me.” “Thank you for taking my luggage for me.” “Thank you,” for whatever it may be. I tell you, the older I get, the more I seek to cultivate being thankful to God and to people.

And then three very short but beautiful verses in 1 Thessalonians 5:16–18:  

“Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”  

So it is God’s will that you give thanks in all circumstances. You see, you can be leading a life that is in the will of God and yet feel that you are out of the will of God if you are not being thankful, because that is the will of God.

There are two directions in which to be thankful: vertical, toward God; horizontal, toward our fellow man. And as we fulfill these two obligations, we are like people that go into a place where machinery is running and it is in danger of a breakdown and we take out our little oil can, and we oil the machinery and it works again smoothly and perfectly.

Well, our time is up for today. Before I close, I am going to make a special request of you. This week and next we are asking our listeners across the nation to express their appreciation of this radio ministry by sending us a special Thanksgiving offering. I am sure you understand that this ministry is kept on the air by the offerings of people just like yourself—people who have been helped and blessed by its message. By sending us your offering at this time, you will do three important things:

1. First, you will be expressing your appreciation. That is exactly what I have been talking about today. You will be expressing your appreciation for help that you yourself have received through this ministry.
2. Second, you will enable us to bring the same kind of help to someone else who needs it as much as you do, but may not be in a position to support us financially.
3. Third, you will encourage and strengthen me personally.

So please take time to say, “Thank you,” at Thanksgiving.